To be a rock and not to roll - 04/07/14

And then there was one. Last week. I get to spend it with the Office Assistants, running errands all over the mission and taking care of business inside the office. Apparently we are actually assigned to a ward, too, but not a whole lot happens there, and since we share the ward with Sisters, they get most of the good stuff. I got to spend my last weekend in Hemet in a beautiful Zone meeting, watching conference with all my missionary friends, and baptizing "D" on the anniversary of the official organization of the restored church. I don't think we ever explained that part, though. Maybe "J" will tell him.

She's such a sweetheart, "J". She's not actually  "D's" daughter, but she's basically being raised by him and his wife. She goes to seminary every morning, she's soaking up everything being taught to her like a sponge, and she wants to serve a mission in a couple years. Unfortunately her biological parents are so against the church that she's going to have to wait until she turns 18 in November to get baptized. But right now she's making us so proud because she can answer questions about the gospel better than some of the kids that have been raised in it. Can't wait until she follows "D" and his wife into the waters of baptism. Being able to dunk "D" was a great way to cap off my weekend and my stay in Hemet.

Buying stuff at Walgreens is usually an act of desperation, under impaired judgment. As a result, I have far more cough drops and chloroseptic spray than I will ever use in the remaining 7 days. But I got a ridiculously sore throat on Tuesday morning and have been fighting it off ever since. My fever broke Wednesday night and it's been more manageable ever since, but I'm still pretty snotty. Thank goodness for Sudafed. 

A detail I almost forgot to share:  I'm still shocked that we managed to hit the Standard of Excellence for the third week in a row, in spite of taking time off for zone meeting, conference, and being sick all day for most of the week. Seriously, we didn't leave the house to teach until dinnertime on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday. I call that a miracle. My companion is super proud. I'm glad that everything worked out so well. Only 10 hit the standard this week. We feel like champs.

Stare at CNN for long enough and I'm sure you'll go crazy hearing the same story of nothing happening over and over and over. I was stuck in that predicament on Thursday night, when my good friend Elder "Mc" and I were told to go to the emergency room. "Mc" had a killer headache, and every doctor that he'd visited in the past six months had failed to solve the problem. Well, the emergency room doctor didn't really fix anything, either. And we got to be in the emergency room from 8:30pm to 2am. That was entirely too much CNN in the waiting room for my poor brain to handle. But I was still more sane than poor Elder "Mc".  He was so mad by the end of the ordeal. 

Way back at the beginning of my mission, I remember how exciting everything was, and how much enthusiasm I had for everything. Now that's replaced with the wisdom of experience and being so used to these things it's almost like second nature. I almost feel a bit jaded, honestly. But every time I see the spark in someone's eyes, it's like it's brand new all over again. Or being able to participate in any ordinance of any kind, whether it's a blessing, the sacrament, or a baptism. I was told by Bishop that he really liked how I looked right at "D" the whole time I was saying the words of the ordinance. It never gets old. 

To say that the mission was the hardest thing I've ever done may not be entirely true. But it is definitely the best thing I've ever done for myself. The mission has shown the greatest return on investment for any significant chunk of time I can think of in my life so far. I've grown so much and I'm so grateful for it, crazy companions and dead areas and all.

Heaven must be like this: love and service. I am surrounded by people that I love and I get to serve God's children in fantastic ways every day. Soon I'll be doing different service, and not be a full-time missionary. But I'll still be able to progress and learn in ways that I haven't yet. I'm looking forward to it and hope to see all of you soon. My last thought is 2 John 2:12. Stay true to the church and to the gospel of Jesus Christ, and I know that God will bless us all in ways we can't even imagine.

When all is one and one is all - 03/29/14

You may have noticed that all my subject lines are song lyrics. And if you listen very hard, the tune will come to you at last. 

This week was pretty fantastic. We hit the standard of excellence and got our names on the email again. Our investigator "M" is still on date and she's quitting smoking cold turkey right now. Our investigator "D" is on date to be baptized this coming Sunday. In terms of the missionary work, there's a lot to be proud of. I won't be leaving the area in worse condition than I found it when I arrived. 

My funny stories this week basically all have to do with moving heavy things. We had five moves this week, three during the week and two on Saturday. So I've been loading trucks and carrying really heavy furniture all week, and I'm flipping exhausted. And I've had to play therapist two or three nights this week, so I haven't been getting to bed on time. But I'm okay with it, because my lovely companion is doing way better at the moment. We had a couple sessions of passive-aggressive repartee, but mostly he's been far more upbeat than usual. 

I was pretty scared, though, when he told me he didn't want to go to dinner because he was scared of the dad in the family that was feeding us. He was really, really stressing out. Apparently he reminds him so much of the jerks that teased him in high school, that he was getting ill at the thought of eating in his house. But I convinced him to man up and grit through it so that I would be able to eat. And in the end, he came away smiling and saying, "I hate it when God proves me wrong on these things." The guy he was so scared of sat down with him one on one and gave him a good pep talk. Then the other guy in the home, our second counselor in the bishopric, did the same thing. They really helped him out. 

I'm also really glad that I was on exchanges on Friday when the other elders finished moving the guys that had a roach problem. One of the elders told me he felt like Moses parting the Red Sea when he leaned back the refrigerator and a sea of cockroaches swarmed out from underneath it. I would have freaked out. Instead I was running around San Jacinto with my buddy Elder "S". 

Oh, I went hiking this morning with my companion and another elder. I'm actually really impressed that we made it all the way to the top without losing my comp, but he was a trooper and made it all the way, as long as we went slow and took lots of breaks. Again, he can do things that are harder than he thinks he is capable of, and I'm trying to help him realize that. 

With all the moving stuff going on, I'm actually pretty impressed that we managed to hit the standard of excellence. But I know that God blesses us when we do service projects for people that really need it. So I shouldn't be too surprised. 

I'm running out of brainpower for this, and I'm not nearly as witty as I'd like. Have a wonderful week, and I look forward to seeing you soon!

Bound by the surprise of our glory days - 03/24/14

A lot happened this week. Let me just preface all this by saying that I am really, really looking forward to my final week in the mission, the week that I extended past transfers in order to see my convert sealed in the Newport Beach temple. In my last face-to-face conversation with President Smart, he told me that my last week in the mission would be fun. So I'm expecting a change of pace for that final week. President knows full well that he's sent a lot of tough companions my way, and I can finally see the light at the end of the tunnel.

From today's encouraging personal email from Pres: "You are a wonderful companion and a tremendous resource for our mission. I have relied on you many times. Thanks for being willing and able. Your good attitude has really helped me."

From the email that everybody gets from Pres: "PS - Those achieving the Standard of Excellence this week are: ... Elders Hansen and "P", .... In addition, 60 other missionaries achieved the Standard in all but one category. Thanks to all of you for your dedicated service. Have a great week!"

Nineteen other companionship hit standard, but I don't think any of them treasured that achievement as much as Elder "P". He was calling all his past companions and sharing the news last night until he fell asleep. 

For those keeping score at home, the Standard of Excellence is our mission's goal for what an excellent missionary can accomplish in a week. For us, it's four investigators at sacrament meeting, seven lessons to investigators with a member present, twenty lessons in total, and a full week of twenty street contacts a day. 

The thought never really crossed my mind that we could hit that goal and get our names in the email (that's our fame and glory, woohoo). But on Thursday, after three member-present lessons fell in my lap, and I realized that we had a handful of non-members that came to church just about every week (I didn't know a couple of these people were unbaptized before!), Elder "P" and I decided to go for it. And we exceeded it. We ended up with 28 lessons, 8 of which were member-present, and 7 investigators at church. I don't think he's ever had a week that good in his life. 

I 100% believe that the prayers of people back home made this entire week possible. Can I make it happen again? I sure can. I just hope that "P's" abundant joy and enormous pride doesn't turn into the kind of arrogance that will get us struck down and humbled by God.  You see, because the whole reason Elder "P" performed well this week is because he thought he was in danger of being sent home. That kind of attitude is what really rubs me wrong about this guy. 

Tuesday was a bad day. We had a district meeting, and my companion threw a fit. Well, he doesn't like that phrase, so I will be more precise: he threw his scriptures, his coat, and his name tag at the car in anger, punched the car a few times, and ran off on his own behind the church building. Two elders went after him. I just stood there. As far as I can tell, after talking to him about it, the thing that triggered that explosion was that six of our elders (the ones living together because they are avoiding the stalker) all decided to wear yellow ties to district meeting, and my companion felt left out of the cool kids club and thought they were bragging about how much cooler they were. So yeah, he punched the car in anger over a yellow tie. 

I was advised by my zone leader/best friend to call Pres and get this kid 5150d. First I had to deal with the fact that we were all at lunch and my companion was convinced everybody hated him and he didn't want to sit next to anyone with a yellow tie on. I did end up calling President later that night, and we determined to let him know that this kind of behavior is unacceptable, and is the kind of thing that will get him sent home. President spoke with him on the phone briefly, too. Suddenly everything changed. He called up everybody he could think of in the zone to apologize to. He was the first to suggest that we plan ways to get more lessons. He became a number-mongering missionary overnight. 

Things were still a little bit rough. I had to take him to the doctor, sit through 2 hours of Jerry Springer in the waiting room, convince him to buy and take his meds, and listen to him talk to the members about his problems. He got a letter from his parents that basically reinforced everything Pres and I said about him needing to shape up or be sent home, and that was scary for him. But like I said, he tried to be on his best behavior, and when Thursday rolled around, I felt inspired to do everything in my power to hit the Standard of Excellence. And so we did. He couldn't be more thrilled about that. 

The best part was on our way home Sunday night, one of our investigators that we picked up this past week called us up and told us that she wanted her and her children to be baptized in our church. Elder "P" wasted no time in putting her on date for baptism over the phone. Her kids are still in foster care and we've never met them, but she wants to talk to her social worker about being able to bring them to church. So that's pretty good news, in my book. 

Again, I can tell that the prayers of everybody on our behalf are making a huge difference. Thank you so much for caring about me. 

I'm reminded of D&C 35:34.  "Keep all the commandments and covenants by which ye are bound; and I will cause the heavens to shake for your good, and Satan shall tremble and Zion shall rejoice upon the hills and flourish;" When God wants something to happen, he can make the heavens shake for our good.  I feel like I'm sitting under a fruit tree and everybody has been shaking that tree for me, and the fruit just fell out and hit me on the head. Thank you so much.

We were born and raised in a summer haze - 03/17/14

Happy St. Patty's Day! Sickness has overtaken my apartment. Well, mostly just my companion, actually

This week was rougher. My companion seems to be deteriorating. He had a cold/sinus infection for the first part of the week, and now he's worried about the fact that his blood pressure is higher than normal . We stayed inside for most of the day several days this week, because I was feeling ill as well. We've had some really good talks that helped him identify some of his issues and left him feeling pretty good, but those good feelings don't last very long. He's asked to call Prez about going home three times this week, twice on Sunday. I keep trying to talk him out of it.

We had a really good lesson with Derek on Thursday. According to my companion, the best lesson anyone's ever had with Derek. Unfortunately I got distracted by the other unbaptized person in that house and didn't get around to putting him on date and had to run out the door at 9:29pm. I'm going to resolve that man's concerns and commit him to baptism this week if at all possible.

I got a package in the mail from my family this week with lots of pens in it. I was super excited to hand out pens to people. The rest of the zone had an interesting time of things this week. We did a move on Saturday with almost all of the elders in our zone. Our elder's quorum was super excited to see us, because there were 4 members of the ward there, and 10 elders showed up. It was nice to be the one to save the day for once.

The Park Hill Elders had a stalker follow them home to their apartment, and was sending them creepy texts all day long. After some prayer, they decided to call President Smart and spent the night with us at our apartment instead. So we had a sleepover with 8 Elders at my apartment. There were slurpees involved. We also made pancakes for breakfast for everybody, that was fun. That apartment is getting vacated, apparently. This stalker guy must have really posed a threat.

Multizone Conference was on Tuesday! It was really uplifting and really fun. I got to give my outgoing testimony there. Elder "M" says my testimony was the best part of the whole conference. If he liked it better than the food, it must have been a good testimony.

One of my favorite things I took from that multizone was this quote by Joseph Smith: "Happiness is the object and design of our existence; and will be the end thereof, if we pursue the path that leads to it; and this path is virtue, uprightness, faithfulness, holiness, and keeping all the commandments of God." I'm doing my best to keep all the commandments of God, and have trust that happiness will follow. 

Did I mention I'm wearing my green tie today? Makes me happy. :D Have a fantastic day guys!

You can check out anytime you want - 03/10/14

I've made a terrible mistake, guys. Yesterday morning, I prayed for patience. So, naturally, yesterday my companion had a breakdown: suicidal comments, wanting to call President, throwing stuff at walls, the whole nine yards.

He's taking his medication most of the time, but he still has had a few missed doses and a couple meltdowns. He told me last night that he feels like nobody understands him and he wants to tell people that he's suicidal but nobody cares. I try to handle him the best I can, and reassure him that God still loves him and that he's capable of dealing with things. In fact a lot of the ward knows about his depression because he's not shy about it, and several of them have offered a lot of support in kind, thoughtful advice and conversation.

So yeah. That's where I'm at. The missionary work is taking a backseat to handling my companion's mental condition, but I'm used to that. I'll keep on chugging along.

I had a pretty happy birthday! It was a p-day, which was nice, so we played a couple rounds of Settlers of Catan. My missionary buds took me out to Buffalo Wild Wings and even paid for my wings. That was fun. Our dinner that night canceled, though, and we didn't teach a single lesson that night. But over the course of the week I got some cool mail, some wicked sweet California socks, delicious girl scout cookies, money (that will turn into computer components someday), two birthday cakes, and a hug from one of the moms in the ward. I consider this a victory. Thank you to everybody that cared!  

Exchanges on Friday were the coolest. The other companionship in the apartment was on exchanges with the APs, and I was with my DL, who is an old friend from Murrieta.  We had a lot of fun that night, and at lunch, and when we met back up at the end of the day. Elder "J" and I did some good work, despite things falling through and plans not working out. But the phone calls that day were the best.

My companion and Elder "J"s' companion called and told us that they had encountered a person that was possessed. Apparently neither one of them knew how to cast it out, so we told them. They were pretty shaken up over it, and we gave them priesthood blessings of comfort that night. Not every day do you get a phone call asking "How do I cast out a demon?"

Well, not even five minutes after that, we got a phone call from the ZL/AP companionship, asking "How do I perform a citizen's arrest?" Apparently they ran into a very inebriated man while trying to contact a referral, and they called the police while following him driving very drunkenly to a taco shop. We were in the area, so we swung by and watched the police show up and arrest the guy. I think I'm going to add a spot in my Preach My Gospel for "people arrested". 

My thought for the day: I know that he loveth his children; nevertheless, I do not know the meaning of all things. We had a speaker on Sunday that spoke about how the things we do in the church are to make us happy. We think that taking a few hours or a couple of days to do our home teaching is a huge burden and such a hardship, but really that's what makes you happy! God knows what we need and the commandments are given for our benefit.

I feel like there was another significant thought I was going to add but I didn't write it down and my brain damage is keeping it from surfacing. I'll tell you guys all about it later, I'm sure. Love you all! Thanks again for the mail, it was wonderful!

Relax, said the night man 03/03/14

Happy Birthday to me! Thanks to everybody who sent me happy emails and letters. I've celebrated so far with a couple games of Settlers of Catan. I inherited a copy of the game from an Elder that went home. So there will be lots of Settlers on P-days from here on out. :D

I have to include this little pick-me-up from my buddy Elder "H", who I met in Moreno Valley but is currently serving a mission in Madagascar.

"Hang in there buddy just one more transfer and you're southern free (that's extra free cuz the south is real America)"

That's darn right, Elder "H". 

So, what happened this week? A whole lot of rain. I'm told that we got more rain in the past three days than the entire year of 2013. It came down pretty hard. And instead of feeling like home, because it rains like that a lot in South Carolina, it felt really alien and strange. I've been here for too long. 

Being transferred in-zone is odd, but being transferred within the same ward is even odder. The Elder that took my place in Diamond Valley North is an old companion of mine, and I love him to pieces, but he and his companion are almost as clueless as if they'd both been freshly doubled in. Luckily I live in the same apartment, so they can just ask me when they have questions. But they typically have questions for me right when I sit down and get comfortable. It's kind of comical, actually, how many times I've sat down or laid down, only to be called back into their room to answer a question about zone leader stuff, or the people in the ward, or whatever else, within 30 seconds of getting comfortable. I think this may be what parents of small children feel like sometimes. 

Lest you think I'm not happy with this Elder who's now my zone leader... well, we get along super well. We sit together and talk and he plays guitar and we talk about the good old days in Moreno Valley. Apparently I'm one of the few people in the mission that know he's a closet liberal, and I try not to pick on him for it too much... at least not in front of other missionaries. He says that our three-way companionship in MoVal was actually the best teaching synergy he's ever had on his mission. That made me smile like you wouldn't believe. I do feel a bit bad that he's having to restart a really dead area. Oh well. At least I got one family going for him.

The temple president of the Redlands temple came and gave a fireside at our stake center last night, and it was pretty darn informative. I actually served in the guy's ward and helped him move out of his house when he got the call. But yeah, we got our recent convert to bring her investigator husband and almost-daughter to the fireside, and it was super cool to see them there and have them feel of the spirit of temple work. Thankfully, nobody asked really stupid doctrinal questions during the question-and-answer session at the end, so none of the stuff mentioned made me cringe for my investigators. It was a really great time.

Something that stood out to me was that too often, young people view the temple as something to check off their list to prepare for a mission: dental work, doctor's physical, interviews, paperwork, temple endowment. But it's important to realize how the temple has eternal worth of it's own far above just preparing you for a mission. You don't need to serve a mission to be in the Celestial Kingdom (believe it or not, I heard it from a reliable source.) You do need to be endowed in the temple of God. So don't skim over that, and take full advantage of the power of temple work before you go. I wish I had gone more often.  

But don't worry too much about me! I keep receiving spiritual confirmations that everything is going to be okay. Surely God knows what he's doing with me, right? I sure believe so. Like my grandma likes to say, Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. 

Have a fantastic week, guys. Love you tons. 

I had to find the passage back to where I was before - 02/24/14

Guys, my final transfer could take the most patience out of everything I've faced so far. Remember the depressed elder in my apartment? I'm his companion now. 

This is good news, though! I'm no longer with the companion that drove me nuts. Although now it's a bit puzzling to me as to why I couldn't get along with him in the first place. He genuinely wanted to work. That should have been enough. 

Now I have to worry about another high-risk situation for the next six weeks. It had me a bit stressed out.  I was thinking about it for a while during sacrament when I felt a very strong impression come into my mind: "Was not my sacrifice enough for you?" 

Wow. I guess I'll trust God a bit more. 

We taught a whole lot of lessons this week. But 16 out of 26 of them were to recent converts and less-active members. We did make a little bit of progress with two of our part-member families. But now I won't be teaching them. Oh well. I hope that I can find the love that I need to succeed in this assignment. 

And now for a thought from Shakespeare.

The quality of mercy is not strained.

It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven

Upon the place beneath. It is twice blessed:

It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.

Sorry for the brevity. I'll try to find time for more thoughts later.

Last thing I remember, I was running from the door - 02/17/14

Sorry this is late. The upside of emailing from the Family History Center is that we can use it any day we want, including President's Day. The downside is that sometimes our connection is pretty spotty.

Things I have lost this week: my wallet.

Still missing: black sweater and spalted oak pen.

I'm doing a lot better in that regard, that's worth celebrating. I'm not totally brain dead yet! Yay.

I think the best things that happened to me this week were all dinner appointments. I ate a delicious panini with basil tomato soup.  That family invited a friend of theirs to church on Sunday. YAAAAAAY. She's not quite ready for the missionary lessons yet, but apparently she wants to come again next week! So that's pretty good news, yeah?

I also enjoyed a carefully presented meal of KFC chicken that she tried so very hard to pass off as not KFC chicken, with her own homemade sides and everything. The bishop's wife made us a delicious ham and funeral potatoes. Sister "N" made us some flippin loaded baked potatoes with chili and bacon and cheese and butter and some gnarly salad on the side. There was the old lady who tried very hard to make us some Asian food. I can't remember what the other dinner appointment was so it must not have been so spectacular, I sincerely apologize to whomever fed us on Wednesday night because I don't remember them at all. 

I didn't get a single letter this week, but that's okay, because my family sent me a really awesome Valentine's Day package. Like with most of the packages they send, I ate several things before I realized that most of the things got sent in twos so that one would be for me and one would be for my companion. So my companion got maybe half of what my parents intended for him to have. Sorry companion! I'm too dumb to see simple patterns like that, I've only been getting these packages for over a year now, so you'd think I'd catch on sooner. Oops. 

I did, however, send lots of letters out. I tried my very hardest not to send any out that appeared to be Valentines-Day-oriented. 

We got our Medical Marijuana expert to read AND pray! And then we asked him if he would give up marijuana if God asked him to. He doesn't think he can do that. Well, we are going to keep helping him feel the spirit and hope that his love for God will eventually outweigh his love of Cannabis. In most cases I would probably drop him, but honestly I can't be too picky about investigators at this point. It's not like I have better things to do. 

I'm planning on giving our zone a quick pep talk before district meetings tomorrow. I'm excited for it already. The numbers aren't as stellar as they have been in the past. Week six probably won't be much better, as most companionships are already anxious for the transfer calls to come and the changes to happen. But I'm going to try to put the love of God back in their hearts a little firmer than before. 

Fun story! We were sitting in the bishop's office at 6:30pm on Wednesday, about to go visit a bunch of new move-ins. Bishop said we should probably visit until 8:45, and then head on in so we can be sure to be home by 9, and because we shouldn't be knocking on people's doors that late anyways. Then the second counselor, whom I love dearly, starts to tease us a little bit about the time we knocked on his door at 8:50 to introduce him to my new companion, and how he was already in bed and all that. I just ate that up, since one of the things that bugs me most about this companion is that he insists on visiting people right up until 9, despite the fact that the white handbook specifically tells us not to, because he thinks that's what obedient missionaries do. Well, after three or four minutes of the bishopric teasing us, Bishop drops this gem: "Elder Hansen is just zealous to do the work." I'm surprised I didn't laugh out loud, because in this instance we were being teased for, I was totally against knocking on the door but I let my companion have his way. And now I'm being called the zealot for letting my companion do his overzealous thing. But that's okay. He could have spoken up for himself if he wanted to take the credit for that. 

Paradoxically, this very same night, Bishop tried to call us but our phone was off, so both he and his wife left us voicemails telling us that a certain less-active member of our ward needed a priesthood blessing, and gave us his phone number and address and instructed us to go give him a blessing. Well, we didn't listen to those voicemails until 9:08pm. I asked him if we should head out and do that, and he said no, it's after curfew. Shocked and confused, I sat there for a few seconds and then asked him again, gently, and again was told that it should wait until morning. So I didn't push it, and I stewed on it almost all night (until I wrote a really long letter to a friend, THANKS FRIEND for being my therapist). We ended up not giving that blessing until Sunday. In the future I'm not going to let stuff like that ride. We need to do what's right, regardless of the rule in question.

Transfer calls are Saturday! But Pres made it pretty clear in my interview on Wednesday that a big part of my assignment here is to watch over the depressed elder in my apartment, so I think we are both staying for another six weeks. I get to finish my mission here in Hemet! Yay. Unless President Smart throws me for another loop, like he is prone to do. We will see! 

Love you guys! Catch you later. 

We are all just prisoners here of our own device - 02/10/14

Another week in paradise. Except by paradise I mean Hemet.

Ether 3:14 is my thought for today. I love how the Atonement allows us not only to live, but to live eternally. And not only that, but to live abundantly in both this life and the next. I love my Savior. 

I didn't get to meet with the goth girl's boyfriend last week, maybe this Monday he'll join us. The most solid potential we had is gone. The Medical Marijuana Expert had one good lesson with us, and then didn't show up to the next. At least we got a 9-year-old in a part-member family to show up to church. That's the best we've done all week. Oh, and we met with the 17-year-old daughter of the Parking Lot Miracle couple, but she still hasn't moved in yet and we still don't seem to be any closer to baptizing her.

I was on exchanges twice this week, and both times we had really amazing days for not having any investigators to teach. I focused on making sure that I could provide the best possible day for my missionaries, and God provided a way. They both really enjoyed our exchange, and we got a lot of really feel-good lessons in even if nobody's really any closer to baptism.

I've had to wear my therapist hat a lot this week with the one elder in my apartment that's really struggling. I also got to play the bad cop and snitch to the APs on a guy who won't stop texting and writing letters to his girlfriend who also happens to be a sister missionary in our mission. 

I am losing my mind. I lost my backpack three times this week. I lost my planner once, I think. I drove right past our turn and got us lost on the way to an appointment several times this week. It really got me down on Saturday, the third time where I had to drive back across town to get my backpack. It feels like I've been stripped of opportunities to teach, my best friends have been transferred elsewhere, my recent converts are disappointing me, and now my ability to function as a normal human being is being stripped from me. I don't know where my journal-writing pen is, the one made of spalted oak that Dad made so pretty for me. I don't know where my sweater is that my ward mission leader in Jurupa bought for me. I don't know why I'm so broken. 

Well, that's where I was on Saturday. But church on Sunday was so inspiring. I mean, I definitely noticed that our speakers in Sacrament where terrible, but I left the meeting feeling so much calmer and refreshed. I know that God loves me and that I am capable of finishing out this mission. Whatever it is that he needs me to do still, I will do my best to get it done. I felt a lot better on Sunday. 

Oh, and I got to have lunch with one of my recent converts on Saturday night, and that helped a lot. He's doing so great. I loved hearing his stories from Murrieta. And the food was pretty awesome, too. We also seem to have reined back in the couple of  wayward recent converts that I was so worried about. Things are definitely looking up. 

I don't know what else to say, other than I love you guys a ton. Keep the faith. See you soon.

Some dance to remember, some dance to forget - 02/03/14

I have wicked long fingernails and have been unable to locate either set of nail clippers that I have acquired on my mission. This bothers me. I will be purchasing a new set today, which means that I will locate the old ones shortly. 

Sometimes we get stuck on little things like how annoying it is to try and type with long fingernails, that we forget the much more important things. Like how flipping awesome it is to get emails from old friends that I love so very dearly. And even though they are a thousand miles away, I can still smile and feel their warmth when I read their words in my inbox, here in the dairy farm desert wasteland of Hemet, California. Where the air smells like cow poop and the old people ride their golf carts on the streets with their shihtzus and chihuahuas on their laps. 

I have my flight itinerary already and I know exactly when I will be landing in Greenville/Spartanburg Airport. That's a scary thought, but in a way, I am glad that I don't really have to worry about that. Like everything else in the mission, it's been taken care of by someone else so really all I have to focus on is the Lord's missionary work, from 6:30am to 10:30pm.

I wonder what my investigators would think if I told them I was thinking about them while I shower.  I'm speaking purely in hypothetical situations right now, because I have no real investigators right now, but in the past that situation has been far more real. 

I had the distinct pleasure of dedicating a missionary apartment this week. I made sure and brought  a team-up with me and had the AP's approval before I set foot in the apartment because Sisters live there. I got to deal with a little more drama related to a Sister and Elder who are romantically involved with each other. We had our MLC meeting in Riverside with all the zone leaders, our ZDM to inspire our zone, and our stake MLC meeting to try and inspire our bishops to do better at leading the wards in their missionary work.  Our stake missionary specialist and had me play a big part in that meeting again. 

I found a potential investigator in the boyfriend of a less-active daughter of one of my favorite families. Sister "B" is currently a science teacher. She's a huge nerd and I love her to bits. Her daughter is kind of scary-looking, with piercings everywhere and the gothic motif going on. But I think I did a good job of treating her like a beloved daughter of God, and I hope she and her boyfriend will be with us when we teach the family again tonight. Seeing that whole family active again would really tickle me. 

Our Medicinal Marijuana Expert investigator started meeting with us again. I didn't put him on date again because I want to see him read and pray first, but he brought up again that he wants to be baptized this year. He also talked about his marijuana sprouts and the different strains and a lot of stuff related to that. He didn't read the assignments we gave him because his book got left out in the rain. I gave him a new pamphlet and we came by the next day. He hadn't read because he knew he was drunk and didn't want to read it and not retain it. I'm glad he realizes that much, at least. Sometimes I wonder if he has enough brain cells left to count as an accountable adult at this point, but I'll keep teaching him just in case. 

I realized two slightly scary things this week: I am a huge wimp when I feel sick, and I really, really like the taste of Nyquil. I spent all day Wednesday on exchanges with a sick elder, and then spent the rest of the week fighting off my own sore throat and achiness but still managed to lead a pretty sick Zone Development meeting and inspired the ward with my testimony of missionary work. Yay for me. I'm going to buy more Nyquil today. 

Oh yes, and things are looking up for the Parking Lot Miracle. The woman not only spoke in conference, but she met with bishop about a calling, came to church, and was called to work with the Young Women. She attended New Beginnings on Tuesday and is keeping appointments to meet with us now. I'm so glad that we didn't lose that family for good. I've learned that the following: faith has a very short shelf life, about 48 hours or so. New converts need a lot of nourishment. It's easy to fall off when you sin. And having members involved in conversion is CRUCIAL. You really need to get Home Teachers and Visiting Teachers assigned at the baptism or sooner, and getting the new guys callings as soon as possible helps a lot. Take notes, sports fans, I speak from personal experience. 

What stuck out to me this week is Alma 13: 27. In fact, I stood in front of the whole ward and told them about how I hope when they hear us teach in their homes, that their attitudes about the gospel change. Much like when I stood in the water with my arm at the square with my very first family I baptized, and my heart changed forever. I want the ward members to have that hunger for gospel knowledge and to share that knowledge and comfort with others. I want them to quake and tremble at the thought that their brothers and sisters should perish or endure endless torment. I want them to wish from the inmost parts of their hearts, with great anxiety even unto pain, that their friends will repent and come unto Christ. 

And I wish they would let me teach their friends so that all my experience and teaching skills can be put to better use... but that's probably selfish of me to think that. All in good time.  

Pray hard, my friends. We are praying for the drought to end and had an area 70 sponsor our area to fast for rain. So we heard a lot about that tomorrow. Guess what? The roads were wet this morning, and it's still pretty cloudy out. God is indeed a god of miracles, and with God, nothing shall be impossible.

Sweet Summer Sweat - 01/27/14

I got to go to the temple this week. That's usually a sign of a good week. I spent an awfully long time in the Celestial Room. I've had a lot of static in my head lately. 

Wednesday we were on exchanges with the APs and I got to spend the whole day with my old companion from Murrieta. That was fun. And while I was on exchanges, I somehow ran into my best friend from MoVal.  It just so happened that we were both on exchanges on the same day, and his district leader was giving a baptismal interview to somebody the APs were teaching. So we got to catch up and it was pretty nice. 

On Thursday I held a puppy and saw a midget riding a bike. That made it an awesome day in and of itself. 

We're still working the ward list a lot, and now the ward council started pushing the ward mission process, which is a Very Good Thing(TM). Still not a whole lot of fruit from those efforts. BUT we had a fantastic lesson on Monday with a friend of a member in that member's home. She was sick for the next lesson but I'm hoping to teach her again soon. This is how missionary work is most effective! The members find them and provide support for them while we teach and handle the concerns that they may have with joining the church. It's like it's inspired by a prophet of God or something. 

The elders and sisters in my zone are doing really really well, even better than the months prior. We didn't baptize a whole lot in February, but the numbers all went up and are staying up after this past transfer, and that tells me that the new companionships are working hard and that the baptisms will come if they continue to put forth that new effort. I'm looking forward to training them again on Friday and meeting with the rest of the leadership on Thursday. Being a zone leader isn't all that bad, I don't think. 

I had the opportunity to give five priesthood blessings this week, yes FIVE. And while the first one was to a sister missionary for her headaches and didn't strike me as super special, the other three all hit me really, really hard. I gave a blessing to two Elders and one Sister in my zone that are struggling with the work in one way or another, and all of them I was amazed at the things that came out of my mouth. Then last night, we dropped by a member at 8:30pm (I was recovering from a really frustrating parking lot bible bash and just went with it instead of fighting it, thank goodness) and it was miraculous. "Oh hey, good timing, we just got done reading our scriptures and were thinking about a friend of ours that needs the gospel." We gave them some missionary tools and scriptures for the husband to use on his friend, and then gave a blessing to the wife that just blew me away. It was wonderful. How grateful I am for the opportunity to speak on the Lord's behalf while blessing his beloved children. And how humbling it is that these missionaries look up to me. 

Keep the faith, guys. The world will know one day that what we are teaching is true, and I want to be known as one of the valiant ones. 

Love you tons.

This Could be Heaven or This Could be Hell - 01/20/14

I apologize for the brevity of last week's message. A series of unfortunate events kept me from writing as much as I would like, and I only got through a couple of abbreviated sad stories before I was rushed off the computer. I promise there are plenty of good things going on in my life. 

Those good things do NOT include our key indicators for this week. Well, we taught a whole lot of lessons... but not very many to investigators. Mostly because we don't really have many investigators. In fact we really only have one at this point, and he didn't come to church. So I don't know what's going on, but people to teach and baptize are pretty scarce. My new companion and I are searching hard and trying to set stuff up with our potentials, part-member families, formers, etc. but so far it's been rough. 

Oh yeah, in my haste last week I did not mention that we got a brand new car. Yes, a 2014 Ford Fusion, with 17 miles on it and the new car smell and everything. I am the envy of our entire mission now. I even got the one that was steely gray instead of white, so it looks pretty darn sharp. We've already racked up 300 miles and a speeding ticket. IT WASN'T ME I SWEAR. Actually I feel pretty horrible about it, our fleet coordinator called and said I haven't taken the mission driving test, so I should do that next time I'm in Riverside, but my companion drive for now. So I handed over the keys to the car, and he got a speeding ticket in less than five miles from that point, going 72 in a 50. We were on our way to rescue the Spanish elders who had three baptismal interviews at the stake center but no baptismal forms... yeah I felt pretty bad about it. 

Wednesday I got to do another Hell Move, as I affectionately call them... when you show up for two hours of service, and they don't have the truck ready to go, and they haven't packed anything in their house and they expect you to do all the work. So we were there for about four hours, and still didn't get everything done with 16 elders there, and we were starving the whole time. Blessings in heaven, man. For every mattress and washing machine I've had to move up and down stairs, I expect another room to be added on to my shiny mansion for my wife and I to frolic in for the rest of eternity. Sounds like a fair deal to me. 

I met some pretty fantastic people this week. I felt like an awesome missionary when I showed up at a hospital to visit somebody I'd never heard of before and promptly made best friends with her and her daughter, who had all kinds of depressing stories to tell.  I was in a hospital which means I was nervous and on edge because I hate hospitals.  I still was super charming and spiritual and uplifting and left with a smile on my face and a return appointment. I looked into things a little further, and the daughter of the hospitalized lady isn't a member... so there may be a potential baptism there if things continue the way I'm going. That was the best accidental missionary work I've done in a long time. And it felt amazing. 

What also felt amazing: Stake Conference. The general session was actually a broadcast from Salt Lake, and we got to hear from Sister Burton, Elder Anderson, Elder Eyring, and some random 70, mostly about going to the rescue and sharing the gospel. All the missionaries were also invited to the adult session Saturday night, which was all about missionary work, too. The very first speaker was a recent convert... my parking lot miracle. Despite not showing up to church, and basically ignoring me all week, she showed up and gave a talk to the whole entire stake about her conversion, and made me so very proud. I'm not sure I could have been prouder if she was my daughter and she'd just won a gold medal. It moved me. Now I just gotta hope that she lets me back in her home this week so we can keep up that spiritual high and keep her penitent and involved in the church still so we don't lose her. Gosh I am so happy with how that worked out. 

God is awesome guys. Love you all and hope you have a wonderful week. 

PS random thought I had yesterday... I can usually tell how much I like a person by whether they comment on my tie being a USC Trojan tie, or if they ask if it's a Gryffindor tie. Tell Uncle Mike I need a UCLA-themed tie... and I'll keep wearing my Gryffindor tie a lot because I love it to pieces. 
 

On a Dark Desert Highway, Cool Wind in My Hair - 01/13/14

Big news everyone! I moved apartments, just down the road though. I still cover the Diamond Valley Ward in San Jacinto, I'm still the zone leader, and I still love my life. I had to say goodbye to my beloved companion, though. The new guy is someone who I happen to know from earlier in my mission. I was his district leader in Moreno Valley for a short while. But yeah, this is his first time being a zone leader but his third time serving in Hemet. Go figure. 

There were several small tragedies this week. One was catching my recent converts, the parking lot miracle couple, smoking a cigarette. That hurt. Everybody has setbacks, though, so not a huge deal. But then they didn't come to church, either. That made me sad. 

Dairy Queen is our hangout. The one close to us used to be owned by a member, and he pays for all the missionaries to eat there for free. Pretty dang cool. Well, we went there after a meeting on Tuesday, and it was closed. Apparently corporate got enough complaints about their crappy service to shut the place down until they can find somebody new to buy the franchise. So we don't get any more free chicken fingers and blizzards for a while. Sad day. 

The elders that live with us got their car broken into AGAIN and their GPS stolen again. That was sad. But the prayer I heard Elder "T" give that morning made me cry it was so sincere. 

I love you guys! I hope to hear from you soon.

Too Many Sunsets I Haven't Seen - 01/06/14

What a week! Happy New Year, everyone. 

Working on New Year's Eve wasn't super productive. We were late to our zone activity because we stopped to jump a guy's car battery and ended up doing two different cars and helping an old guy try to find his car in the same parking lot. I say we tried because we never actually found the car. Either he parked in an entirely different parking lot or his car got stolen. But yeah, eventually we got to the stake center and found everybody playing board games. I didn't participate in the two different Risk games, but I played a round of Munchkin with the people who were eliminated early. 

This is where things got interesting. Earlier that day, I got to interview a couple of investigators for baptism that one of my district leaders taught. This kid was very simple and very pure. It was pretty fun. After the interview, though, I heard about some of the problems that are going on in this district... the sisters' district. There are only two sets of sisters in the entire Hemet stake, and there have been issues with them, thankfully mostly amongst themselves and not out in the open. 

Well, at about 10:15 on New Year's Eve, I got a call from the APs that I needed to confiscate a phone from one of the sisters in my zone. So I got to drive across the zone to take care of that. On the way back we got some Martinelli's and ended up staying up almost to midnight talking with the guys in our apartment and wondering if our upstairs neighbors were going to fall through the roof and booty dance their way back upstairs. Later in the week, I got orders to confiscate the other sisters' phone. I spent a lot of time talking to the APs and President this week. 

I also spent a lot of time on planning for meetings this week. We had the APs attend our District Leader Council on Wednesday, exchanges on Thursday, Missionary Leadership Council on Friday, Zone Development Meeting on Saturday, and Stake Missionary Leadership Council on Sunday morning. President Smart came to that last meeting, which he normally doesn't, so that was a pleasant surprise. I got to share with him my unexpected news... 

... So, I got permission from President Smart to start applying for college, which is super depressing. Saturday night, I was starting to work on that, and I discovered that I was awarded an Associate Degree from Spartanburg Community College in November of 2011. I'm actually a college graduate already and I didn't know it. How fun is that!? Associate in Science - Secondary Electives 11/01/2011.  

Sunday, I got to confirm my Brown-Eyed Girl. She is such a joy to be around. I got hit super hard with the Spirit right after that. I had to clear my mind a little bit before the confirmation, because I was thinking about how I'm a pretty horrible student. But here's the thing: I can't even remember to read a textbook or attend a class, but I have been given God's power to perform saving ordinances for his precious children. I am far from perfect, but I have the seeds of divinity within me as God's son, and I carry His priesthood as long as I am worthy. I felt pretty darn special at that point. I may be frustrated at my shortcomings, and there are more than a few of them, but I have great worth to the most powerful being in the known universe. And most importantly, I have the potential to be with him and be like him. Infinite potential. That's a pretty special thing. 

You are loved, guys. Keep on keeping on. A song made me cry this week - Infinite Love by Afa Garrington. I'm so grateful that God loves me so much.